Skip to content

Follow us!

Get in touch with us

Your First Time: 10 Tips for Queer Women

Your First Time: 10 Tips for Queer Women

Bio: Meg Ten Eyck is the CEO of EveryQueer. EveryQueer is an LGBTQ+ media publication catering to the needs of queer, nonbinary, and transgender people. Through detailed travel content, brand consulting, curated events parties, and worldwide LGBTQ tours our team teaches queer travelers how to safely see the world., Meg has visited 65+ countries, spoken at LGBTQ conferences on five continents, published her first book, and had her content read by more than ten million people.


Embarking on your journey into the realm of queer love is an exhilarating adventure filled with discovery, connection, and self-realization. It can also be a little nerve-wracking, especially if you're about to experience your first sexual encounter with another woman. But fear not, we’ve got you covered with a comprehensive guide packed with practical, fun, and considerate tips.

1. Communication is Key

First and foremost, it's important to talk about what you're comfortable with. It's okay to be nervous, and it's okay to express it. Your partner will appreciate your honesty, and it will help set the mood for a more relaxed, enjoyable experience. In the grand adventure that is queer love, communication is your trusty compass. It's completely natural to feel nervous, and expressing this to your partner can actually bring you closer. Remember, vulnerability is strength, not weakness. Open dialogue will not only set a relaxed mood but will also pave the way for mutual understanding and respect.

2. Set the Pace

Remember, there's no rush. Allow the situation to progress naturally and at a pace that suits both of you. This isn't a race, it's about exploring each other's bodies and finding shared pleasure. This is not a sprint, it's a marathon—a beautiful, sensual marathon. The journey, after all, is as important as the destination.

3. Do Your Research

There’s a wealth of information out there from books to online resources that can help you understand the complexities of sexuality. However, remember that many erotic materials are created for straight men and not for queer women. Every woman is unique so what works for one may not work for another and culturally queer women have their own set of sexual mores and expectations. Knowledge is power, especially when it comes to understanding the intricacies of queer sexuality. 

4. Consent is Non-Negotiable

Consent is sexy and crucial. Always ensure that your partner is comfortable with everything that's happening. Remember, 'No' means 'No', and silence doesn't mean 'Yes'. Consent isn't just sexy—it's mandatory. This doesn’t have to be awkward, infuse consent into your dirty talk and turn the heat up a notch.

5. Explore and Experiment

The beauty of queer love is that there are no set rules. Feel free to explore different ways of pleasuring each other. You may have heard terms like “top”, “bottom”, “Dom” and many others online, don’t worry too much about labels and identities while you’re first learning. Explore, experiment, use your hands, lips, and don't forget about Osuga toys—they can add a whole new level of fun! The beauty of queer love is its boundless freedom. 

6. Safe Sex is Important

Consent is sexy and crucial. Always ensure that your partner is comfortable with everything that's happening. Remember, 'No' means 'No', and silence doesn't mean 'Yes'. Consent isn't just sexy—it's mandatory. This doesn’t have to be awkward, infuse consent into your dirty talk and turn the heat up a notch.

7. Don't Ignore the Rest of the Body

While it's easy to focus on the 'bikini zone,' don't forget about the rest of the body. Neck, breasts, inner thighs—all are erogenous zones that can heighten pleasure when stimulated. While it's tempting to focus on the 'bikini zone,' remember that the rest of the body is a treasure trove of erogenous zones waiting to be discovered. 

8. Aftercare is Essential

After the act, spend time cuddling, talking, or simply holding each other. This can help you both feel loved, secure, and satisfied. Just as important as the act itself is the time you spend together afterward. You might not have mind-blowing sex the first time, and that's perfectly okay. The key is to keep exploring, communicating, and practicing. Don't put too much pressure on yourself to have mind-blowing sex the first time. The key to great sex is exploration, communication, and practice. So, keep at it, and remember to enjoy the journey.

9. Sexuality is complex 

Understanding your body and what you enjoy is a key component of sexual fulfillment. Experiment with fantasies, Osuga toys, positions, and types of sexual encounters. Don’t make the assumption that everything you enjoy will be the same as your partner's desires. Having similar anatomy doesn’t mean you have the same erotic tastes. But being able to understand your desires and communicate them to your partner opens a door to mutually fulfilling sexual experiences. 

10. Remove expectations

Remember, your first sexual encounter with another woman is a special moment. It's all about discovery, connection, and fun. So, take these tips, breathe deep, and dive into the beautiful world of queer love. Remember, your first sexual encounter with another woman is a special milestone. It's about discovery, connection, and most importantly, fun. So, take these tips, breathe deep, and dive into the beautiful world of queer love. You're about to embark on an amazing journey! You've got this!

In Conlusion: Your first encounter in the realm of queer love is a special milestone. With open communication, a relaxed pace, and a commitment to consent, this journey becomes a beautiful exploration of pleasure and connection. Embrace the boundless freedom of queer love, prioritize safety, and remember that aftercare is as crucial as the act itself. Sexuality is complex, so experiment, communicate, and enjoy the unique adventure that lies ahead. Remove expectations, breathe deep, and confidently dive into the captivating world of queer love. You're ready for this incredible journey!

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published

From our Instagram

Fast & Discreet Shipping

30-Day Returns

Full Warranty & Support

100% Secure Payment